new blog add
http://beyondboundary.blogspot.com
I want that too!
"S told me how Y surprised her during her birthday. He told her to come out of her house as he walked towards her with a slice of cake with a candle on it. It sounds really simple and that everyone could do it for anyone. But no one has ever done that for me before. To me, it felt like the most romantic thing… given the fact that they had already broken up at that point of time. I want the kind of love that hits you with a BANG!.The kind that will leave butterflies in your tummy.. and make you go.. awwww" AWWWW… DUK I WANT THAT too.. -melt-
You know how they say you must be contend with what you have and all. After all these years, I realise i’m really bad at that. And i’m still thinking now if that is a bad thing. I mean, if you’re contended, then what’s there left in life? It’s not as if we’re 50 60 years old and it’s time to sit back and enjoy what we’ve carved out for ourselves. I’m 20, we’re all below 30! How do you know what’s the benchmark to stop at so you can be contend with it? What if you stop searching, looking, working upwards, working forward and miss out on someone or miss getting that scholarship or promotion or whatsoever that could make your life richer than now? What’s the benchmark can someone tell me?
I’m going to change back to blogspot soon. haha.. sorry. i miss the skins and the easy ‘cut and paste’.
Life is made up of choices
We brought him home 6 years ago. He had crossed unnoticed into middle age but still acted every bit the puppy. He showed no signs whatsoever of growing up or winding down. I had never thought Marley as any kind of role model, but i was aware that maybe he held the secret for a good life. Never slow down, never look back, live each day with adolescent verve and spunk and curiosity and playfulness. If you think you’re still a young pup, then you are, no matter what the calendar says.
I brought my friend cum insurance agent home and she spent more than half the time attending to my mum. And i’m really glad she bothered and thanks for being patient babe =). It turns out that my mum bought several policies for all of us, savings, accidents, life for dad but her life is NOT protected.. Yes she didn’t buy any life protection plan for herself and i was scare to death because old age is drawing nearer for her and where am i going to come out with cash in time of crisis huh? CPF medisave and healthshield only covers hospitalization.
Almost immediately i felt a heavy weight of responsiblities on my shoulders. There are so many questions on my mind, and I’ve to agree with the girls, 21 is not going to be an easy year. 
Even though i’ve a job, i feel empty inside everyday. I don’t feel that i’ve accomplish something out of it, yet i find myself losing a little bit of me everyday. I hate working with old hags, who always turn out to be full of grudges with life, with vitality, with youth, they just lash out mindlessly as if you’re to blame for their unfortune. Festive season just make it worse. All flights are like super full and there’re so many new girls on board (ya so fast i’m a senior liao) I feel like every flight is a test of patience. And I’m really really impress with myself. "it’ll be over soon it’ll be over soon it’ll be over soon" that’s what i say under my breath everytime shit happens while my senior says "i love my job i love my job".
What won’t kill you will make you a stronger and better person.
See you at the top of the empire state building on valentine’s day
"I miss you so much that it hurts…"
Sleepless in Seattle
This show… just melts my heart.. So classic! Okay so i just managed to catch it though it’s quite an old show (as u can see from the way meg ryan and tom hanks dress haha). It’s not a show that makes your heart swell with overwhelming emotions like Jerry Mcguire. It has this mixture of simple humor and romantic phrases and quotes from old classic love stories that make it so .. aww… ok i don’t know what i’m talking about anymore but it’s a MUST WATCH for those of you who’s a sucker for love stories like lake house and message in a bottle.
The amazing thing about love stories and movies is that they always capture and play around the simplest and smallest things that we often miss out in real life. It’s like no matter how you’re feeling in your relationship or at whichever stage, you can almost ALWAYS relate to it in one way or another. It really makes me think, without fail, if there’s really such a person for each of us; Or if we’ll all bound to reach this stage of euphoria of being with someone who makes you just want to be with him/her and tell yourself ‘this is it, i don’t need to look any further. THIS IS IT’. Don’t you just long for those initial honey mooney feeling to last? Like even if your relationship is stable both of your heart still skips a little when you see your other half standing there waiting for you with open arms, your heart still warms your lips still curve up with a tiny smile when you hear the 3 magic words.. even after 10years, 20 years, 30 years… These days, love seems to come hand in hand with time. What i mean is, we’re all too busy to spread some love. Actually, do you really need alot of time to spread some love, make someone feel good?
Do you see what i’m trying to say? You don’t need alot of time and effort to love, but you need alot of love to cover up for all the time and distance apart. Key word is the one in bold, not the one in italic.
B.K.K.
Ok so i took quite some time to update about my trip. Been feeling so listless at work the past 3 days and i’ve been feeling SO TIRED… i slept so much lo.. but i also wake up damn early lately. It doesn’t help that i’ve used up all my energy during my 7 days leave. hahahha… Lucky they didn’t give me 14 days. I would have tendered my resignation. hahaha…
That’s where we stayed. Baiyoke Sky Hotel. Me and my sis really love the hotel room. haha.. i mean, don’t imagine yourself in australia or new zealand la, in bangkok, this is really good enough. Clean, spacious room with a bathtub and a walk-in wardrobe. Most importantly, so comfy!
Petrunam market was just right infront of our hotel. The cheapest digs are along these streets and the roads will be block by evening time when the night market starts with all the booth set up around. We went to all the hot spots everyone is telling us about like Mah Bo Kong (MBK), Suan Lum, Chatuchak just to realise the cheapest of all is just beside. But there’s a catch to this la. It’s more filthy than any of those places mentioned.
This is the night market that’s so huge (like 6 times of bugis street) it take us two nights and we still didn’t finish walking through! There’s so many great digs there we just force ourselves to walk on even when our feet is telling us ‘enough liao la!’ As for shopping malls, actually i highly recommend Petrinum mall (other than MBK tt is). This mall is known for its more fashionable and trendy clothes and all.
This is ….
driven by my dad. haha… I enjoy the tuk tuk rides. Windy and you get to really feel the city with your skin. But you can’t really travel in that every single day… your lungs will turn black from all the air pollution.
haha… my dad, trying to act like the father, ah bing, in Zhen Qing. hahaha…. ok so ah bing has a duck rice shophouse not some old mama shop lookalike, but it doesn’t matter, does it? he..
some random picts.
I hope my next trip is some beach resort!
Desert flower - Waris Dirie
I always have the same feeling when i’m nearing the end of a good book: I wish the story can be longer! And when i’m done with the book, i will hold it near my heart and think of the entire story. I will say it’s very much like savouring a good new york cheesecake or chocolate cake from Awfully Chocolate.. totally satisfying and never enough!
Anyway this story is really amazing. Or i should say the author, who’s a model-mother-african nomad-UN ambassador, is really quite a woman. Maybe because she’s writing her life story, it’s more heartfelt. The story opens up to Somalian nomad culture, life of a runway model in NewYork, but mostly and crucially, the experience of a somalian woman who undergo circumcision (Female Genital Mutilation) by the age of five.. [please be prepared to read on, it’s going to be painful]
The operations are usually performed in primitive circumstances by a midwife or village woman. They use no anesthetic. They’ll cut the girl using whatever instruments they can lay their hands on: razor blades, knives, scissors, broken glass, sharp stones - and in some regions- their teeth. The process ranges in severity by geographic location and cultural practice. The most minimal damage is cutting away the hood of the clitoris, which will prohibit the girl from enjoying sex for the rest of her life. At the other end of the spectrum is infibulation which is performed on 80% of the women in Somalia. The aftermath includes immediate complications of shock, infection, damage to the urethra or anus, scar formation, tetanus, bladder infections, HIV and hepatitis B.
(After sewing up, there’s only a small hole for any body fluid to pass through. So imagine it coming out drop by drop..)
After going through the cycle of womanhood that began prematurely with my circumcision at age five, and came full circle with my baby’s birth when i was about thirty, I had even more respect for my own mother. I understood what incredible strength the women in Somalia possess to bear the burden they carry simply because they’re born female. Trying to work scrubbing floors when my periods were so painful I thought i’d pass out. Having surgery to open the crude scars of my genitals so that i could urinate properly. Waddling around nine months pregnant, taking the subway uptown to Harlem, climbing the stairs, and shopping for food at the market. Spending three days in labor thinking I would surely die right there in the delivery room in front of the doctors.
The reality is that i’m the lucky one. What about the girl back in bush, walking miles and miles to water her goats, while she’s in such pain from her period that she can barely stand up straight? Or the wife who will be sewn back up with a needle and thread like a piece of cloth as soon as she gives birth, so her vagina will remain tight for her husband? Or the woman nine months pregnant hunting for food in the desert to feed her other eleven starving children? Or what happens to the new wife who’s still sewn up tight, and it’s time for her first baby to be born? What happens when she goes out into the desert alone, as my mother did, and tries to deliver it by herself? Unfortunately, I know the answer to that question. Many bleed to death out there alone, and if they’re lucky, their husbands will find them before the vultures and hyenas do.
I think this is so down right cruel.. It’s a religious practise for godsake. I mean, that’s so scary. Imagine yourself as someone who’s lowly educated and not exposed to the world and you can only believe in your god and religion, you’re left with no choice even when you feel it doesn’t make sense.
Ok back to present. I just came back from Bangkok this evening and it’s a leg breaking trip. haha.. but it was a fruitful trip. Update again when i’m free ya. alios~
Bangkok here i come
Okay so this is not best time to go to thailand but there’s no refund for the tickets and all… so i’m risking my life going shopping in bangkok in a few hours time. Can’t wait! I’ve been feeling so listless lately.. yawn~ thanks to those who messaged/tagged =) See ya all by tuesday evening!
I’m a cotton wool
I’m a cotton wool. Not because i’m soft and fluffy.
But because i’ve pit-less absorbance.
Please don’t throw me away after use.
I’ll be as good as new if you bother to put some effort in squeezing me dry.
It doesn’t take too much of your time, just some love and care.
Don’t make me fight alone trying to stay contended with charity love please.
I’m not that hard to please, am i?
To our babe.
Please don’t be afraid to let us in on ANYTHING that’s happening to you. That’s what friends are for; to hold us together when we’re tearing apart, to tell us everything is going fine, to not only celebrate happiness but also to simply be there when times are grey.. Friends are there simply to be there, right? Knowing what you’ve been through alone when we could have been by your side for such a grave matter really shakens me.. It’s unfair if i were to ask you to keep us up to date to everything before anything happens because it’s more of comforting us compared to comforting you, but babe we’re worried sick.. Let us be there for you just like how you’ve been there for us, okay?
Love you to the bits.
It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other perople won’t feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.
Sometimes, or I should say most of the time I find myself living on other people expectations. It has come to point whereby I don’t know how to put a stop to it, especially for people who are really not worth my efforts. But I’m not saying i don’t have a mind of my own. I know the right from the wrong and i’m not afraid of offending some people in the course of choosing to do something right. That’s how it was. Now that i realise the world is such a small circle, my supposedly well established company is not as wide as i thought, everything i do, everything i say, i carry it out with fear.. And i hate this feeling. I hate to feel incapable and inadequate.
I beginning to wonder if this is how it’s going to be like, in any other company any other place. You know the feeling, when you make a decision and you tell yourself you’ve to make it through to prove something to yourself and to others? Especially when it’s something that most people deem far fetching and tough? I feel that sometimes, but i’m teaching myself to put that aside. Because it ain’t worth it to fight on for something you don’t really want for yourself.
